Need help! How do GIRLS grind/freak?

Discussion in 'General Dance Discussion' started by budebuai, Apr 1, 2006.

  1. budebuai

    budebuai New Member

    I'm a teenager and theres a dance at my school like.. next Friday.
    My bf wants to take me, but I'm kinda freaked out because I don't know how to freakdance, because my old school didn't host dances at all. I read a couple of threads from other posters; however, it seems to be that they are targeted more towards boys.

    I would love it if someone was able to help me on this, as I do not want to embarass myself.

    Thanks in advance!
  2. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Before you stress out about it, make sure that the school doesn't have rules against grinding at school dances. A lot of schools do.

    I'm not sure why folks assume that the grinding threads here are just for guys. They're not. Grinding is exactly the same, no matter who's doing it. Fit your body and legs in with your partner's and dance. That's about it.

    The advice in the threads we have applies pretty much across the board. If you want to do some of the more exotic booty-shaking moves (that are more for the girls) relax. If it doesn't come naturally to you, it's not gonna happen by next Friday. :lol:
  3. budebuai

    budebuai New Member

    Thanks. My school doesn't have rules against grinding, but its just that when I've seen people grind a few times, the girls are usually in front and doing something different than the guys, and besides, I've never done it before anyways.
  4. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Understood. My take? First. Schools may not have rules against dancing, but that's not the same thing as rules against grinding. Unless I'm mistaken, grinding is pretty unpopular with school officials. You may not have anything to worry about.

    Second. Decide whether you really want to grind or whether it's your boyfriend who wants it. If you don't want it, don't do it.

    Third. The really cool moves that you see girl dancers do in music videos are based on what're called isolations -- learning to use one muscle group at a time. Some people do it naturally. Those who don't often take a long, long time to learn. Friday's out of the question. Don't worry about it.

    So the advice in the other grinding threads still applies. Forget about looking exotic and sexy like the girls on TV. They're professional dancers. Nobody'll be watching you, anyway. They'll all be worried about how they look. lol.

    To answer your question. How does a girl grind? Anyway she wants, in conjunction with the music. The guy just follows. So don't sweat it. You'll do fine. :)
  5. SPratt74

    SPratt74 New Member

    I personally found grinding easy. I used to dance with a guy named Jeff, and we used to go to the clubs (which you shouldn't go to until you reach the age lol), and I guess we were good for we would have people surrounding us and watching us the whole time. It was fun! (I sort of wish he were my partner now!)

    But just to give you some girl advice, I don't know if this helps any, but in Ballroom I have always been told to let the guy lead you. So, don't worry about a thing. However, just make sure that if you don't want to do something then you let your boyfriend know that is not acceptable! Have fun at your dance! :)
  6. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Grinding is different, IMO. :cool: There is no formalized lead follow, that I've ever seen. So sometimes the girl leads. Sometimes the guy does. If I were a newbie looking to dance, I might let the guy lead for a minute or two, just to get a feel for what to do. But, since defining boundaries can be so important, it's pretty unlikely that I'd just wait to be led, especially if I was at a dance, dancing with several different guys, some of whom I knew better than others. If, as a girl, you lead, it's less likely you'll be led to do something you don't want to do. :wink:
  7. SPratt74

    SPratt74 New Member

    That's true too! I guess it also depends on whom you are with. I for one always let Jeff my partner lead me. However, you are right that girls can lead too! I only said to have guys lead, because if you don't know how to grind, just following what your guy does might help you get into the movements anyhow lol.

    I got to thinking about it last night, and I wonder if grinding is even allowed in high school nowadays? It wasn't when I was growing up lol, and I don't think that my sister was allowed to dance that way just a couple years ago in fact. So, that is an interesting question! Now that I think about it all, my guess is no, but again, that depends on your high school. But some of the bigger high schools like the one that my sister went to still say no. Interesting!
  8. Sagitta

    Sagitta Well-Known Member

    Schools/many consider grinding simulated sex acting to music. Don't think something as graphic as this is officially condoned at a school function.
  9. bronzebailey

    bronzebailey New Member

    Grinding in school

    Hey um yes i'm am pretty sure they alow you to grind in schools. I went to a formal dance at my boyfriends school *its a catholic school mind you* and they didnt say anything about us all grinding. which was pretty awesome. just at one point a bunch of super tall guyz got together and formed a circle and started moving and almost knocking ppl down so they made them just calm down a bit, which i was glad for because i almost got ran over. That was my first time Grinding and my boyfriends first time. its way easyer if you take your shoes off especially if they are high heels. and just go with the flow it will ccome natrally to you and your boyfriend might just show you somethings.
    hope this helps ;) have fun
  10. nucat78

    nucat78 Active Member

    My guess is that if I tried to grind with a woman, she *would* freak. Hmmm, OTOH, I know two or three...
  11. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    I wouldn't freak ...but I WOULD knock you senseless
  12. mamboqueen

    mamboqueen Well-Known Member

    Well, I'd have to see who it was first. lol.
  13. fascination

    fascination Site Moderator Staff Member

    not me...there is a way to court a lady...that other stuff is for after he has convinced me he is a gentleman...and in private
  14. WaltzElf

    WaltzElf New Member



    I agree that grinding strikes me as a prefectly stupid form of interaction witht the opposite sex, but then I'm much more likely to convince a girl I'm a good sort with my Waltz :)
  15. I going to toss my two cents into the ring here, mixaphorically speaking. Now, mind you, this is on the basis of absolutely no experience whatsoever. I didn't dance so much as a single step in highschool, so this comment will be of probably zero value to the OP.

    Anyhow, what I think would be really cool, when all the other teenage couples are doing their grinding and whatnot (which in my humble but infallible opinion is rather artless) would be if a couple broke ranks with their peers and took off on a beautiful foxtrot, or west coast swing, or a rumba, depending on the music. Even a hustle would be pretty cool in a retro way.

    Now, I may be not young, shall we say, but I'm not an old fogie. I have no moral qualm with grinding, but any drunk meathead can do that. There are much cooler, funner, and (dare I say it) sexier dances. Give me one smoking tango over a night of grinding.
  16. Peaches

    Peaches Well-Known Member

    Eh...tried/done both...both have their place, both are fun*, depends on the venue. Wouldn't grind at a wedding, wouldn't FT at a club.

    *Fun being used in a very subjective way in this case. I'd never, now, suggest that FT-ing could be fun. :rolleyes::p *runs for hills*
  17. Lioness

    Lioness Well-Known Member

    Heh, that's what DP and I are sort of planning to do at our formal.
  18. QPO

    QPO New Member

    O agree, why cant ballroom be made to be cool again with young people. Being up close and personal is a foxtrot or waltz, quickstep, tango.... It needs to begin when they are young... sigh...we dancers need to get up and revolt and preach/teach to our local primary schools. ;-)
  19. WaltzElf

    WaltzElf New Member



    Absolutely. In ballroom, (as the man) you're holding a beautiful woman in your arms. She looks like a princess and she smells devine. You are her world for that dance, and you're in control of giving her a wonderful time.


    Grinding is like pornography. It's an instant thrill that is soon forgotten. Ballroom dancing is like an epic, emotional, sensual film.


    What kids don't get is that, while it's subtle, ballroom dancing is far sexier and far more about being a man or woman than grinding will ever be.

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