Ballroom Dance > Flirting and Sleeping Around....

Discussion in 'Ballroom Dance' started by standardgirl, Apr 19, 2005.

  1. standardgirl

    standardgirl New Member

    Ok...I am being brave to write this, and I am not intending to hurt anyone, or to make any generalization about any dancer or dance teacher...please don't take me wrong :D :D

    Ever since I started dancing (which is not even that long ago), I have heard so many stories (some definetly real, since I saw it too) about who sleeping/dating with who. For most of the stories, it's about the dance teacher and a student.

    I know we have talked about this somewhere else about how some teachers trying to create the love illusion to get students to buy more lessons, but for a lot of those stories I heard and saw, it just wan't the case. The student ends up taking free lessons in some cases, in others, the student doesn't even pay the teacher directly (ie, the student doesn't decide how many lessons to take, it's funded/supported from a third party).

    There are clearly cases where I don't see the teacher benefits from it. and I don't think it was done on purpose at all. Yes, I understand how all the physical intimitation can make it easy for human to fall in love, but shouldn't most teacher already become so used to it that they don't feel it anymore? So...why do this happen so often in the dance community? There are just way too many, IMO, people sleeping with people, people divorcing, and breaking up in this community.

    Another thing I have noticed is that a lot of the teachers do like to flirt with their students even when it is clear that there is no romantic interest involved. Again, in a lot of the cases, the teacher is not really doing it to get more it just a psycological connection about being a male dancer and being good at flirting?? This would be a really interesting topic to research on....
  2. Throwaway Overshare

    Throwaway Overshare New Member

    In many of these cases, at least one of the parties already had a very empty personal life. The match with another dancer may be far from perfect but at least it is someone to be close to. And a lot of those who take up dancing do so because they are dissapointed in the rest of their life. So stereotypically you have a teacher with no personal life and a student dissatisfied with her personal life. That's almost a recipe for something to happen.
  3. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Sad but true. :?
  4. Sagitta

    Sagitta Well-Known Member

    I flirt with everyone and I have a pretty satisfying personal life. :wink: :)
  5. spatten

    spatten Member

    Hey chiwenl, you posted an interesting topic.

    I have a couple thoughts. First - Spend a little time in the theater world and you will think the ballroom dancers are puritans :) At least most of them are not trying to get money out of eachother - nobody has any - they are just sleeping around for the fun of it. Flirting is a requirement.

    But really I think that either environment is conducive to the problem. The key element is many hours spent together with high emotional interaction. This may be interpretation of the dance, acting out a scene or whatever.

    I also think, that people most likely to be involved in dance and theater are in general a little more flirtatious, open, and just more likely to get involved sexually. This is quite a generalization - but I think it is probably fair. I mean - swap professional actors or dancers with professional engineers and I bet most of the problem would change dramatically. Instead of sleeping with each other they would be arguing about who is right :)
  6. Throwaway Overshare

    Throwaway Overshare New Member

    Teachers don't have many people they can properly get involved with though. No time for non-dancers. And not supposed to date or even be too personal with students. And can't date teachers from different studio! If there is no one proper to date, eventually they stop worrying and end up with someone convenient. Wanting companionship is not bad, it is only bad when there are obstacles to good companionship and so they settle for improper companion.
  7. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    *giggle* Ask some of the dancing engineers on this board. I wonder ... :roll: :wink: :lol:
  8. Sagitta

    Sagitta Well-Known Member

    Okay Jenn. Confession time.
  9. Throwaway Overshare

    Throwaway Overshare New Member

    cant they do both?
  10. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    :lol: :lol: :tongue:
  11. spatten

    spatten Member

    We are a very special group.

    And yes we dancing engineers can do both. I'm not convinced about non-dancing engineers. I don't think most of them are getting laid :)
  12. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    guffaw!!! :lol: :lol:

    Edit: Just for the record, I deleted half my post. Not DF appropriate material. :roll: :lol: :lol:
  13. spatten

    spatten Member

    No fair laughing in a word I don't know. Thank goodness for cachinnates)
  14. pygmalion

    pygmalion Well-Known Member

    Oh! ROTFL! I just caught that. :lol: :lol: :lol: Yep. is a life saver. :wink: :lol:
  15. cierre boca y baile

    cierre boca y baile New Member

    I think the problem is inheirent with dancing itself. It is at times, if you are doing it right, supposed to be intimate, romantic, flirtatious, sexy, breath-taking and most of all FUN. Who doesn't want a relationship like that? It's easy to see how the lines can get blurry and want to take it beyond the dance floor. Has anyone who has been dancing for any length of time, not at least though about what a relationship with one of their dance partners would be like if only briefly? Think about all the actor/actress relationships that occur from them working romantically together in a movie or show...I think dancing is pretty similar.
  16. Pacion

    Pacion New Member

    I flirt (incessantly) and I don't sleep around... :oops: :lol:

    Getting back on topic, I know that this is in the Ballroom section but it is something that happens in every danceform. I have come across some salsa teachers who, in my opinion, see the relationship/sleeping with their students as a perk of the job. :roll: I think it also depends on the individuals involved and yes, I admit to having experienced highly charged dances that not even a cold shower would have been enough for me! HOWEVER, I firmly believe that what happens on the dancefloor STAYS on the dancefloor. That way, I don't do anything that I would not otherwise do in the cold light of day and, as I told one guy, at least I will still respect him in the morning. :wink:
  17. DWise1

    DWise1 Well-Known Member

    Actually, engineers can be extremely promiscuous -- about swapping emailed geek-humor and free-ware utility programs.
  18. Another Elizabeth

    Another Elizabeth Active Member

    But they are far more likely than the community at large to practice safe computing. :wink:
  19. tacad

    tacad New Member

    I agree. The dance scene can get complicated and full of drama very quickly if one isn't careful. And even if one is careful. :wink:
  20. africana

    africana New Member

    Yes I'm offended stop it :lol: who says we can't argue and flirt at the same time?? shows how much you know :p multitasking buddy 8)

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